Reality-Check

Here I am about to enter my Junior year of college. In 2 very short years I will be graduating and heading out into the real world. My entire life my life plan has been as follows: Go to amazingly huge and wonderful Southern University (check,) join the best sorority full of the finest girls on campus (not so much) find the most proper southern gentleman coming from a very prominent southern family (still looking..) be proposed to with a 4 carat beautiful diamond and have my very own candlelight (there's still time..) graduate and get married and live the best life ever. OK, well obviously nothing has gone according to plan. This is causing me to have a midlife crisis, well I suppose since I haven't even hit 20 yet, a quarter-life crisis. What am I doing with my life? Why am I here? Where am I going? I am taking a class this summer and we have to make a resume, sounds normal right? This made me realize that I have nothing to put on said resume except a sorority I don't even like, hyperventilation starts now. I don't know what I want to do with my life, all I know is I want to do something fabulous and somewhere fabulous. Every day of my life I wonder, would I be happier somewhere else? Should I transfer? Should I get a job? Should I be doing an internship? Is this what my life is going to be? Is this as good as it gets? I am obviously full of questions, but not full of answers! College is supposed to be the greatest 4 years of your life, what if I don't feel that way? What if I am spending my college days worrying about what I am going to do when my college days are over? Do other people feel like this? Are other people as happy as they seem? Does anyone my age actually have it all together? Sad thing is, only I can decide what I want to do, which is a problem because I don't know. I need someone to tell me what to do, maybe I should hire a life coach? That would be horrific, but, I do feel like I need that. I only have 2 years left, I want them to be amazing, so wonderful that I look back on them and smile. I also want them to be worthwhile, I should be working toward some kind of career goal so that when I do graduate, I am for sure headed somewhere fabulous. Time to start figuring out what to do in order to get my fairy tale southern life.