Past, Present and Future

I don't know about you, but I live for Monday's so that I can watch Gossip Girl. To say I am addicted would be an understatement. I am honestly convinced it is real life, I just wish it was my life. But, for those of you who watch, you know Serena. Oh Serena. So much money and such a crazy messed up world. I feel like in every episode Serena is trying to "find herself." She spends summers traveling Europe "looking for who she is." She doesn't go to college because she "doesn't know who she is yet." You get the point. While I don't think not going to college and traveling the world is the solution, I think we are all looking for who we are. That's what growing up is, becoming who you are destined to be. That's the stage of my life I am in right now, growing into who I am as a person. It's fun, but it's also scary and weird all at the same time. I search for answers everywhere and I am constantly waiting on the next best thing to happen in my life. In high school, I couldn't wait for college. Now that I am in college, I can't wait to graduate. I am always looking forward to the next step. But while my eyes are focused on the future, I am completely forgetting to live in the present. We shouldn't worry about what hasn't happened yet, the important thing is what is happening here and now. You have to live for the moment before its gone. If you spend all your time looking for yourself instead of just letting things happen, you will miss out on life.

How many times have you heard someone say, or have you said, "The past is the past." Well, yes. But, you need to remember that your past has made you who you are. Instead of looking to your future for who you are, look to your past. I realized this weekend that I was running from my past and only concerned with things that haven't ever happened yet. I got to catch up with my best friend from home this weekend. We hadn't seen each other in so, so long. While we were catching up, I started to wonder why we ever lost touch. And then I realized is that all my focus is on the future and leaving my past in the dust. But what good does that do? Why lose touch with a great friend just because our lives went in different directions? Someone who knows your past is the best person to carry with you into your future. Sure, you make new friends and go different places, but that doesn't mean that your old can't come to your new.

So I realized that if I wanted to know who I am, the answer is in the past and not in the future. Tomorrow isn't promised, future isn't promised. So live for the now, live for today but don't forget where you have been because that is what makes you who you are.