Sunday, April 25, 2010

Selective Hearing

As anyone in a relationship knows, there will be things about your significant other that bother you. If you disagree with that statement you are either single or lying. One thing about my new beau that tends to bother me is that whenever he gets on a roll talking about something, he doesn't stop. While this tends to bother me, I have to remind myself that I should be glad I am dating something who actually has something to say. I won't lie, he is a pretty smart fella. But I will say that I can have a very short attention span, I have a tendency to tune people out, whoops. So having a beau who likes to talk and a short attention span make for an interesting relationship. However, I did say he was smart, and he is, so sometimes he says something that makes my ears perk up. Sometimes he says things and it makes me want to grab a pen and write them down! Today, he said something that got to me so much, I am telling you about it. I'll be honest and say that I can't exactly remember the conversation we were having, or what was said before and after, but I do remember that today he said, "I can't promise you the world, but I can promise you me."

I have a hard time remembering that nothing and no one is perfect. I often beat myself up for not being a perfect person. I have to remind myself that perfection will never happen, I just need to let that go. It also doesn't help that I have a pretty close to perfect boyfriend, and I wonder every single day why on earth he thinks I am perfect too. But that's a different story. I realized that in relationships, people often get caught up in trying to be everything and give everything to the person they love. You want for them to be happy so you would literally do anything in the world for them. But the problem is, the world is not ours to promise. We have no control on anything that happens in this life. So while it is, of course, romantic for your beau to promise you the world, they are really just giving you false hope. So, when my ever so smart beau told me that he couldn't promise me the world, but he could promise himself to me, my heart melted.

Now, before I continue, let me just remind you that I never want to be that couple, you know, the ones you hate because they are so googley eyed over each other?

I appreciated his honesty. He realizes he can't promise me the moon and stars and everything under them, but he can (and has) promised himself to me. I know that he would give me the moon and the stars if he could, but let's be real, he can't So instead, he promises himself to me. It literally knocked the wind out of me and I realized that promising himself to me was worth more than any star in the sky. I don't need the world, I just need a promise of commitment. I don't need the world, what would I do with it anyway? I just need him. Who knew it could be so simple? You don't need a guy to promise you the moon, you don't need a guy who spends entirely too much money trying to impress you, those things won't last and in the long run, you won't remember them. But what does matter is that you have the other person, 100%.

I am learning as I go about this whole, how to be a girlfriend thing. While it is challenging, it is also fun. While I will never admit this to him, the boy is helping me learn more than he knows. So, just remember, you can't promise anyone the world, but you can promise yourself.

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